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Darrin
Male/United States
Last Visit: 5 hours ago
Making mistakes is preparation.
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I swear I was high last night...(Keep reading, I didn't do any drugs, nor did I ever or will I ever.) I drank too many Monster Energy drinks and then went to bed late. I had some really creepy experiences last night, and probably the weirdest dreams ever...
Last night after I went to bed, I kept hearing the bathroom door outside my room opening, and the vent going on and off, and I thought I was seeing lights from my closet. Then I got this sudden urge to take my shirt off, because I thought I was wet or was going to be wet...then I thought my blanket was itching me, even when it wasn't on me I was freaking out itching myself. Then I thought I heard bubbles coming from my brother's room next to mine, and I heard random shouts and gunshots throughout the night, but they were quiet, like they were coming from a television.
My dreams, on the other hand, were really REALLY demented...like...I'm actually embarrased I even had them, even though I can't control what I dream about. Not to mention they were pretty...um...innapropriate? So I'm not even going there...
I'm never doing this again. I know this is a pointless journal entry but...dang...is this how drugs effect people? Haha
I don't think I'll ever drink any Monster or eat any candy after 8 again...(Even though I went to bed at like 11:50 from my sugar rush)
Current Residence: Up on the hill Favourite genre of music: Rock, metal, classics, basically anything from the 1940s to the 1980s. Favourite style of art: Art flavour Operating System: Windows 7 Shell of choice: The ones at the beach Wallpaper of choice: My designs Skin of choice: That's racist Favourite cartoon character: Randy Marsh Personal Quote: Making mistakes is preperation.
Favorite moviesGran Torino and Due DateFavorite TV showsTwo and a Half men, South Park, and almost anything on the Science channel.Favorite bands / musical artistsAC/DC, Metallica, System of a Down, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, The BeatlesFavorite booksThe Halo series, (Fall of Reach, Ghosts of Onyx, The Flood, so on) and soon to be Gears of War series. (hoping to read Aspho Fields)Favorite gamesGears of War, Assassin's Creed, Halo, The Elder ScrollsFavorite gaming platformXBOX 360Other InterestsGuitar, Designing, Drawing, Animating, Video editing, Programming.
ok i need help and i know this is sooo pathetic but part of me hates the "popular" kids but another part of me wants to be just like them they seem so happy and normal and im rly strting to get depressed over it ..... idk what to do and u r the only person i can talk to about this and im so so so sorry to bother u with this rigt now because i know ur life is so much harder than mine right now but i rly dont know what else to do im sorry
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-- i keep falling down down down .. please god let me hit the ground let my feelings fade away until this world sees a better day~
Ok, this is a pretty complicated matter, but I'll try to explain as best as I can.
From what I've noticed, there really isn't even any kids that are popular or aren't, think about it: What makes someone popular? Nobody comes and says "You kids are popular, you kids aren't." Everybody normally does fit into a group in which their personallity is similar, and the only reason these kids seem like they are the "popular" ones, is because they in all think they are better than everyone. When they play sports, they have everyone watching them play, their parents always congradulate them and tell them what a good job they are doing. They think they are great people, and it's their cocky ego-indulged attitude that makes them look "popular".
So when you want to be their friend, that's understandable, everybody sees how happy they are and everyone strives to be accepted by them, but in all honesty, there's nothing that makes them popular or better, they just have a bit of a higher opinion of themselves, to where they end up letting you think they're also better because they act so smug about it.
If you want to be their friend, that's acceptable and understandable. I was friends with all of them for a long time, until Brittany just got everyone to hate me, I used to have a lot of friends. Now I've lost a lot of them, and I'm in the same situation you're in. But really, it doesn't matter too much to me. It's always good to have friends, no matter what, if you can laugh with someone, there's no point in being their enemy. But, they have an obsession with themselves in a way that makes them the opposite of a good friend. It's fine to be their friend and laugh, and if you want, you can go for that, it might work. But - don't ever become their "Best friend", because to them, friendship is more of a game, and you can lose theier friendship REALLY easily. I never became too emotionally attached to any of them - except Brittany. So when I lost it all, the only thing I was hurt over was her. It's not worth being their friends if they'd easily give up a friendhip like that.
The conversation we're having now - they aren't capable of having this conversation. They aren't the type of friends like you and I are. The reason they seem so happy is because they're emotionally undeveloped, and they don't really feel nany empotions but the ones they want to. That just shows right there, we actually are more mature than them.
Bottom line: If you wana be their friend, go for it, but please, PLEASE don't let it get in the way of your friends now, because if you lose them, you might have no-one. If you become their friend, be their friend, but don't become their best friend, don't get too involved, because it will only hurt you in the end.
heh, thanks I guess. But really...it doesn't matter too much so don't get involved...you're only bound to get hurt in the end. It was inevitable that I did, too, only people with real connection to their feelings are smart enough to let something get close enough to hurt them.
Sta.sh
Dumbfounded 
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